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Saturday, May 28, 2011

The poisonous shackles of resentments

Greetings my gentle friends and readers. End of a week again and its seems like My certainly has headed in a weird direction as the month continued, doesnt it? I mean the beginning was intriguing in itself but the deterioration across the weeks was noticeable. Lots of bad things again happened to good people and forces one to take stock and reflect.

But then gain, when were we promised a bed of roses and how bad IS that news that comes or came your way? I believe and have written many times that everything happens for a reason. I so believe that and there is a reason for every event, even if we are unable to see this at the time. Frankly, sometimes I dont think even if someone DID tell me the reason at the time, it would make me feel worse or better!

Resentments are like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die, painfully. I learned that years ago and it so holds true now 10 years later. As opposed of crying over spilled milk, you've got a glass thats empty now, so full it with apple juice! I mean seriously, why expend so much valuable time, effort and resources to getting back, loathing in your head or liberal applications of pins into your voodoo doll?  If we operate under the premise that something happened because it was meant to be by design and not accident, then the challenges open new opportunities. Next question is what do we do with that and what are the subsequent plans and goals and dreams that you can achieve and try? 

If you are alive, functional and can share a gentle ouch and word then why squander them? What a waste and to feel dead is to basically be such. To resent others is to basically resent yourself. Why? Because you are so wrapped up in what is basically a useless delusion that you cant appreciate the beauty of the day for the shiat! When you are in a pissy mood because of whatever, do you really notice the colour of the sky, scent of flowers, smile of a child or even your own breathing or heart? Not a chance. What a waste.

Certainly there are many disappointments in life. BUT, and I stress but as its YOUR choice my gentle friends, if you are fearless enough to look at the positives and let go the crap... you will find so many more positives. I see it all the time and to get in a healthier frame of mind is to learn and use the past experience,  not be shackled by them.

Love the day, look at the miracles of the moment so you can be yourself, often.

 

--- Joel Lamoure   May 2011 

6:31 am edt 

Saturday, May 21, 2011

The Blame Game on Judgement Day...

Ok folks and here we are again, but this time I am writing on a Saturday. Maybe its the fact its a long weekend here in Canada eh that allows me to be up to date but I know there are still many other things on my plate this weekend. Stuff like a presentation, strategizing the future, bills and a journal paper review for UBC. So that means a perfect time to blog. Oh yes, its "Judgment Day-May 21/11"....

One action can mean so many things to so many people. Sadly, I am finding more and more people are pessimistic and then spend extra time whining and bemoaning their plight and then trying to shift the blame on others. This kills me. "Im getting to that" or "Its not built right" or "I didnt have enough time" or "Its not my responsibility". Accountability is the end of the game here folks and the buck stops at the person that agreed to take on that assignment. Spare me the bellyaching, please. Lets just get this done and to get things done right, one needs to plan ahead. Believe it or not, most accidents are preventable!

More importantly is who are you and what do you stand for and what do you believe in? Sometimes it isnt in line with the standard rules of engagement and one has to look outside the box. To be a rebel for what you believe in, in order to advance objectives and beliefs. Its is said that if you have not upset someone in your life, the you havent stood up for what you believe in. If this then means and needs to take a stand and advance the goals of your belief system, then sometimes that needs to be done. 

Herein lies the golden art of communication and development of a team. For we cannot exist in silos and march to our own drummer. Almost always that is a fail. As tempting as it is to believe that you have the best idea and no one else is on board or that (and I SO hate this) say that other people are "stupid", then you will fail. Talk, but even better listen and communicate in a TWO-WAY fashion. Learn and explore. See where are the synchronicities and beliefs are. Then join up and develop more. Chances are they are and have and do cross your path already!

As a team... Come up with suggestions, ideas and plans as a team..not just whining. THAT will help advance the cause. And if the cause is rooted in the forces of good, fairness, light and justice... I do believe across time you will succeed. 2000 light bulb trials to get one that worked, and Einstein never gave up. And he wasnt the first one to make it.. but the first that made it a common household fixture. That is the vision in the strategy.

Stand up for what you believe in and be counted, for that is what one will be remembered for. The laughs, hearts, strength and courage. Not your car, house, boat or physical worldly goods. But who you are, what you did and the gifts you possessed, yet shared without hesitation.

 When you are open and honest and know your root belief system and practice and engage with communication, then you can be yourself, often.

 

--- Joel Lamoure May 2011 

 

4:50 pm edt 

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Excuse me, your karma is showing...

Gentle readers, here we are again and I apologize for yet another delay that this blog isnt on a Friday or Saturday but again being thought through and typed on a Sunday. My apologies for that and is due to a variety of factors must notable is that I work 3 in 7 weekends in this little stretch plus hospital inspections and more. No whining and excuses though and Im here and its Sunday! Rainy days and bringing even more flowers.

The topics are also elusive as there are wonderful ones that come to my mind and then in true ADHD fashion are gone, only to be replaced by something else such as a shiny sign or a pretty pink crayon, or the converse. Oh well. Lets see where this goes. I liked this title and seems to reflect many things going on and many peoples experiences lately. I have said and still so totally believe that many bad things happen to good people and I so know the opposite is true and people with the karmic energy of shoe scrapings excel.

Here is the point and issue though.... DO they really do well? HOW do they feel? Does a plasma TV equal happiness? There is so a difference between good karma and possessions. Dont even get me started there and those for all intensive purposes lead one down the concepts of false idols and I can guarantee THAT aint going to help you. Blessed are the meek and those that help others to help themselves. So the work you do now defines the future results later and sorry folks, I dont want to be near some of you in a rainstorm! Some that are suffering now in some way or in the wilderness are the best people I know and would in a heartbeat extend my hand to help. Attitude and actions define altitude and outcomes.

Driving even further down from that point is not all that help others do so selflessly or the desire to advance patient outcomes or make peoples days a little brighter. See that one all the time. When one is focussed on themselves totally no matter what their societal title, there is no room for others or the patient. That is baaaad karma baby.

Want to go down the positives? Ask what action or what would make happiness. What does that happiness look like and most importantly HOW is it achieved. That how and its impact to others is critical. When you do that action, WHATY is the belief system behind it and dont give me the textbook crap.. I want the answer from the gut. And finally WHO will it help? Your paycheck, a new TV or someone else. Is the equation wins across the board or does someone lose?

I can almost guarantee that most of the supposed good interventions when assessed and drilled down dont meet those criterion, are in reality are focused in you or hurt someone. Stop, dont keep going and reflect on actions and subsequent reactions. Bad karma is a biatch. And it asks for interest. 

Be yourself, often.

 

--- Joel Lamoure May 2011 

 

8:54 am edt 

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Nature AND Nurture on Mothers Day

Welcome my wonderful gentle readers on Mothers Day. A day to stop and reflect on the people that give so much and are and represent over half of who we are. Fathers pass along half of who we are and the mothers the other half. I like to think the caring, compassionate and romantic side of all of us come from our mothers. The side that wants to call out and help, to cry when there is injustice and the desire to make the world a better place through sauve and finesse. 

Mothers dont just have to have had a child. They can be people that inspire, care or give of themselves to help others. Who can see the detail in the print and the lines in the shadows and help others advance themselves.  

To the person that could multitask and be a doctor, teacher, lawyer, baker, chef, maid, nurse and police officer all in one. And at the same time minimize the strife and challenges they were going through themself. As I get older, that sacrifice becomes more and more evident. The endless hours of love and frustration mothers devote for a few shining moments of glory. And that glory isnt even their own, but lies in the result of their labour of love. (No pun intended).

I am who I am as a result of all the successes and challenges that I have faced. But the teachers that we remember most are those that face the difficult and impossible and carry it through to the best of their abilities. For that comes respect, beyond the basic love. And love is an intelligent concern for others in its most rudimentary, broken down form. For my mother at one point to love me enough to tell me she loved me, but didnt like me and my actions was a turning point. For she loved me enough that I could realize what I was doing and the flake unleashing an avalanche of destruction. Every one of us have similar stories. For those who lost their mothers younger for any reason, you have morphed into beautiful people who still carry her very near and dear and are fantastic mothers yourselves in what I have seen. We learn, we adapt and we evolve at point of need.

I know many inspired people and the paradigm shift that occurs when you take that responsibility of becoming a mother is huge. The be a conduit in the Miracle of Life and passing along the genetics is huge. A good and any mother does that and stops and reflects on the miracles of the day. A great mother is one that earns respect by their actions. There was good and bad yet by genetic and the nurture afforded we became who we are and defines a great mother I believe not by WHAT we become, but by how we FEEL and CARE, especially about ourselves. I was truly lucky.

By watching and learning what was and is done by our mothers and developing my own strength that allows me the ability to be who I am. And only then can I be myself, often.

 

--- Joel Lamoure Mothers Day, May 2011 

9:47 am edt 

Sunday, May 1, 2011

The Sound of Silence

Greetings my gentle readers and I apologize for being away and late for this instalment of the blog. Co-operation versus competition last week engendered some good debate and discussion. Where do we go and why do we have that compulsive need to delay and cause so many problems in the world of competition when we could likely be so much further ahead by co-operation? If you stop and reflect, it does even more add to the concerns and heighten the insanity. Not only do we have do do more faster and harder than the competitor, that it takes a toll on the mind, body and resources.

To take this one step further, what of co-operation? I touched more last week on the inanities of the competition. Per wit, that everything had to be flashy. Go big or go home mentality so to speak. How does one co-operate? I mean, we are all told to play nice in school and get along in this uber politically correct world that we have created. But to co-operate at a real, in depth level and perspective? That is the hard point, for it means one must listen and find someone that things and feels and reflects the same as you, to be able to realize there is a common goal. If it is REALLY what you believe in and a problem shared is a problem halved and could advance the objectives of each by collaboration, then why not? Not to is in fact the insanity that plagues so many and the need to be territorial, have a scare resource etc is a problem and bane of so many unneeded battles.... not just between countries and nations, but between individuals as well? And to stop and reflect, there is often one of the 7 Deadly Sins at play, usually Pride, Greed or Envy.

Want to move ahead and advance what you believe in? Stop and listen to others around you and what they believe in. How does it link with yours and could the group become greater than the sum of its parts when working in collaboration? Of course the answer is yes. To stop, reflect and step back is antithetical to the beliefs in our busy world. Maybe a breather, regrouping and retreat and listen to the silence, the voice in your head and capture and seize the minute beauty of the day and to be lighthearted is the way and key to open those linkages. To stop and reflect builds cohesions. To be light of heart and listen to everything else besides yourself, but awareness of your inner goals and objectives is the path to being yourself, often.

 

--- Joel Lamoure May 2011 

 

11:52 am edt 


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