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Friday, July 29, 2011

To be, or not to be, that is the question.

Greetings my fellow and gentle readers. Thanks for coming this week and had a wonderful week of learning. The fascinating thing is that we have learned so much in what has gone on around us. It subsequently has taken who we are and if you read this blog last week about friens, you will realize that you are not the same person today that you were when you read that. We are 67 countries, 2377 unique visitors and 8763 page views. My goal is to give to people so they can give to themselves and realize the beauty and miracles of the day and elevate their consciousness beyond the 3 dimensions of the world, but the mystical beyond that and the beauty that is called life. This is done by shamelessly sharing the blog and link. If you are a more auditory person, I recently did a blog interview talk with Adam DeYoung, a very inspired fellow running Krishna Lvoe on Western Medicine with Eastern Phllosophies. The audio recording of that interview may be found here.

Seriously? Psych mumbo-jumbo bull-shiat? Nopes. Seriously. That is the reality my friends and the sad thing about life is that most people miss these wonderful learnings and opportunities that exist in their day. I have touched on this before, but they are too bent with the BIG (or B-I-G) wins in the week (which 99% of you will not have achieved) taht you miss out on the minor miracles of the moment. Very sad when one stops and thinks and reflect of the cudda, shudda and wudda.  The integral piecesof the tapastry of the moments of your lives have been woven under your noses and the lesson passed you by.

Where do these leaenings come from? Everything my friends, everything. There are all types of fabrics in the tapestry and the ingredients in the cake that are you. The wise will take those moments and with mindfulness appreciate their intricacies as there are many. You can even capture and collect and bottle these up through actions and moving ahead and seizing opportunities. Hold them precious. They may be small things but still are specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and tangible. Per wit, they are S.M.A.R.T. 

Also, they define what you are and what you will be. To miss the opportunity is not to be.

Hamlet in his soliloquy stated "To be, or not to be, that is the question:

Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? To die, to sleep,
No more; and by a sleep to say we end" 

"The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark". First Folio 1623 Wm Shakespeare

So we can my friends look to that all comers of events present outrageous fortune or a sea of troubles. That is the story of a life. To compose a great novel, which we are, that is a collection of words. These are the small things in the day and the life. Friends help give you the rich letters and the miracle of the moment helps the anagrams that are the letters become words. Good friends are wonderful like that! The letters of the day that by themselves may seem not good or bad or the converse. But broken down these small sachets of the minutiae may be the letters "l" and maybe a 'i" and perchance an "f" and for smiles and chuckles lets have an "e" cross our path in our week.

That is life my friends. And to seize it wholeheartedly with both hands and feet, embracing it by immersion is to be yourself, often.

 

--- Joel Lamoure July 2011 

4:47 pm edt 

Saturday, July 23, 2011

National Friend Day.

Happy weekend to my gentle readers, no matter where you are in the world.  First off, please share this blog and at July 23rd, we were at 67 countries and 2295 unique visitors, 8262 visits. That represents 102 new and unique visitors last week that had a chance to reflect! Always trying for more!

There are many things that have happened this week that give pause and cause for reflection. I am circling around basic friendship, impacts of disease causing dis-ease and the insanity of mankind on mankind and subsequent impacts. The later comes from a PTSD lecture and the Norwegian terror attacks and is well covered in the news. Maybe I will focus on  basic kindness... friendship.

So, Happy Friend Day. Doesnt matter the calendar date, as that could be any date actually. But a day and time to appreciate the special people in your life that are in your ripples and circles of life around you. Some are close, some more distant and some about the position of freaking Pluto compared to the sun. (And they are cold, brrr baby). Some are close like Mercury and feel the burn. 

Very few people will ever read this and almost no one will share the link or post it with an intent to help others. There are very very few that do that. That is a friend. These are people that share and give of themselves to help others, even when the chips are down. Its not easy being  friend as you may be the subject of distaste when your friend is "out of season" or in the limelight when your friend is "in season". You share similar emotions as you feel the pain of the one that is closest to you as if it were your own.

I watched and observed this week of 2 types of friends... the Facebook Friendship and the Personal Physical Friendship. This week I have had the opportunity to see friendship at so very many levels and the varying degree of friendships, but chose those two as they are often the most common.

Facebook:To watch what other people say or do as thy interact with others as "Friends"..same term, different context is a vast learning. There are some that give and give and share and never seem to be down. There are some that are cyber bullies in sheeps clothes and there are some that never reply to any text whatsoever or share. Interesting mix and yet they all have the term "friend". There is rarely a full congruency between person and actions and what is on Facebook, but the truer the person, the better the correlation. Just a hint here, if you ARE my friend on FB, and I have met you in person and reading this, that means you ARE congruous and that why we are still connected! If you want to be friend, you know the process.

IRL: These are painful, overbearing and stressful at times. Cant hit delete here or "unfriend" someone. These are the people that stick in when someone says fcuk off. These are the friends that listen to the same stupid story over and over again and laugh each time...because they are part of the story.  These people are the pages in the book of life and its not a sterilized relationship. There are different levels of friends, but very very few true friends. Those are the ones that will stand shoulder to shoulder even when you dont realize you are in the line of fire. They will be there to help you and listen and love and care. They have the balls to tell you that theres a problem and take the barrage of shiat, and not expect anything back. But there IS a limit and there MUST be two way understanding and giving. If one side gets the crapola (verbal, physical, racial, personal attacks) and no reciprocity ...likely wont last. "Whip me again please and thank-YOU"....nopes. Not my style sweets.

You dont need many of these wonderful and giving people in your life, but they are critical. Thy know your strengths and weaknesses and augment them, not penalize them. I thank G'd for the few I have and the beauty of these souls. They should be cherished, not pushed away, but they know and w know periods happen where space is needed and that is allowed to happen...no questions.

So while we give thanks, maybe...just maybe, we should look not at others as to what sort of friend we EXPECT, but what sort of friend can we BE? A friend can be anybody or anyone. It will be there and a two way relationship. It is not an object, as that is unhealthy. Want to love an object? Get a blow-up doll. I'll send you the link.

Love yourself and value yourself, so that you may be a friend to others and enter in that two-way symbiotic relationship and appreciate what you have. This allows one to be a better person. You need that assessment and knowing what are the needs of all parties before you can reflect the mirror in the persona you are to subsequently allow you to be yourself, often. 

 

--- Joel Lamoure July 2011 

8:28 am edt 

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Mental baking soda for that fresh feel....

Sharing is caring... which is this weeks instalment of the blog my gentle friends and readers. First off, please share this blog and at July 9th, we were at 66 countries and 2114 visits. 1 week later we have 66 countries and 2193 visits. Please share this blog and here is the link to send to others and friends: http://www.joelwlamoure.com/id43.html as the goal is to see how many people with this simple tool that we are able to help and connect with. Repost and reconnect and lease email the blog and link.  

As the week has rolled along,  I use Saturdays to wonder what the common threads of the days are. I hope to be able to offer you some mental baking soda for the mind to help clear the air. Allow me to share with you today...

Surprisingly, this week the common thread has been this blog and the synchronicities and lines and shadows that have helped come to clarity with this tool. This has been a week of the broken doll in the sandbox, redefining borders and self valuation. A week of light and love and realizing that the light a candle can offer can spread to others and become a fire of desire towards health. A week of meeting some inspirational people and reflecting that gift back to them.

My gentle readers.. I tried an exercise this week to see what would happen and if I could go a day and put my money where my mouth is. That being to spend a whole day and only see positives and to use my mouth to smile and see where that would go. Number 1 learning was that it is contagious for yourself and others. The radiance and contentment often takes some of the people that are in that transition of living and slogging through the day and not sure which way to go... they smiled! Was so radiant to see. And that the positives begat positives. There will always be crud and shiat in the day, but to ask "Is this important enough to drag me down?"... the answer is almost universally no. Dome things and events will arise in the day and must be dealt with. HOWEVER, and perhaps the most critical is what you chose to do with that after. Want to furrow the brow, cause constipation, feel gas, be crampy and otherwise unhappy? Carry lots of toxicities and refuse to put them down. 

Its fascinating as humans that we tend to hold on to resentments, issues, shiat and garbage. That rotting disgusting, smelly stuff in the fridge you forgot about? You ditch it. So why my sweet friends do we insist and persist in holding onto old disgusting, rotten and unhealthy emotions and feelings? Resentments kill and sometimes have to ditch the leftovers that were sucky and vile to start with and create a new dish! Very little is worth ruining the dish of today, but as we know the smell of death and often permeates everything... lose it! Mental baking soda to freshen the mind.

It is possible to start fresh and it requires a conscious effort to put away the crap and crud. THAT is the mental baking soda in the fridge that is your mind. I mean, the brain really is a storage vessel isnt it? To keep memories fresh? Throw out the leftovers and enjoy the fresh scent my friend. It DOES work. Smiling and looking to the positives is akin to baking soda sprinkled liberally. Breathe in and go ahhhh!

And like any good remedy, I also look for the fun value... as any of you that know me personally can attest. Baking soda is wonderful for many kid experiments that can leave one in awe and laughing and blow up a balloon, create a fizz and other stuff likely forgotten as we have become adults! Clean-up may be involved... but whatever as there was an abundance of seriousness and there can be some kid-like awe with the exercises!

Fun and healthy go hand in hand to make laughter and the days lighter and maybe, just maybe in there my friends you will get the feel that you are finally becoming and being yourself, often. 

 

--- Joel Lamoure July 2011 

 

 

8:15 am edt 

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Excuse me, your karma ran over my dogma

Greetings to another week instalment of be yourself often my fine gentle readers. As usual, I try to find the events of the week on filter them through into something captivating, witty, relevant, catchy and useful. Sadly, at that I fail most times but out of 6.8Billion people on earth, someone, somewhere, somehow will find this informative and useful. If not, pass the blog along.

That is one challenge that I would like this blog to be read in every country in the world. We are at 66 countries now and 2114 visits at July 9, 2011. If you want to help make my dream possible, please link and share this blog and let others feel the wins and the positive statements. At very least lets get people thinking! And if you are a real lover of statistics and want to see how you passing the information along helps the cause, the statistics may be found here. PLEASE SHARE the link and blog.

As such, this really ties into the cutesie title. Karma is an amorphic construct linked to the wheel of samsara and represents that an action and actions and thoughts will eventually be "paid forward" to you. Translation, if you are an arse... look out baby as its coming right back atcha and will be like being given an enema in front of a pay toilet an hour later with no change. Also, that if we are and can be positive and giving in what we do, the Universe will manifest and return those blessings. Translation.. may be an enema day but you are flush with coin.

Dogma is a more authoritative structure usually with a hierarchical bent to it such as an established religion. Spirituality may be a piece but not the sum whole. Much to balance off here about spirituality and belief systems vs. religiosity, but thats a discussion for another blog.

Lets tie all this in together to what I usually write. You want to learn, benefit and be gentle to yourself and others. You hope and believe that there will be reciprocity in your travels and workings with others. Surprising, when nice to others, you get that in return. Toxic people can suck the oxygen out of a room and put everyone on tension. They yell at people on the phone, slack off on un-relevant things and then get bent that they have no time to do their duties. And thats because someone scheduled and plotted against them! OMG.. call out the conspiracists and look behind the grassy knoll. Nope... you did it and that will continue to ensure more crappy days ahead. Hallelujah and pass the plate. Sad.

Positive actions and positive beliefs and a smile in the day and belief in positive outcomes are what drive positive karmas. Want a positive day? Be positive! Not positive yet... fake it until you make it! Then the path is far more comfortable, yet sadly the least travelled one. Positives truly do come when you can be yourself, often.

 

--- Joel Lamoure    July 2011 

9:42 pm edt 

Friday, July 1, 2011

Metaphorical and Physical Fence Building 101- DIY

Good day and Happy Canada Day to my Canadian friends and a pending long weekend for the United States Independence day just 3 days away on the other side of this weekend! In advance, before you read any further, let me extend my desire for a mindful and peaceful and of course very safe holiday travel for all of you. For those in staycation mode or being handymen (and women), be safe as well. Inflation was almost 4% last year thanks to fuel costs over the past year despite little to no raises across North America. Guessing that includes me this weekend in fix-it mode.

ok... now there are and should be somethings that strike terror into the hearts when you see them coming. A tsunami, a hurricane, floods or me with a sledgehammer. Yes folks... its fix the fence day today. I have 210 ft of fence and in the past 18 years have managed to fix or replace just under half of it. This weekend another 26ft goes. Its sort of job security, as when it gets done (estimated to be in 2031)... time to repeat. Government job. Suffice to say I'll try to stay out of my own emergency room.

I digressed.... what is important here is the act of the building the fence itself and the replacement of the old one. There are s many factors to consider. Height, cost, collaboration with neighbours (the ones that still talk to me ;-P), materials, reusing, discarding, stewardship and more. All the orders must be done, help in line (and Im not the boss on this build.... want the fence straight) and lots of logistics. We will keep the metal clad fence and only replace struts and beams and posts. Save money, save the environment. 

A wise psychiatrist suggested I look at the analogies between fences in my day vs weekend job. While I covered off above the physical fences, what about the fences that we have in our lives? Why are the fences there and are they a help or hinderance? In my case, the physical fence is mandated by law due to the pool. Sometimes its privacy, sometimes to avoid people, mark territory etc on the physical side. So fences may be beneficial or a hinderance. And there are so many types of fences.. privacy, wood, metal, chain link and different heights etc etc ad nauseum. Poop, I digressed again. Back to metaphorical fences... they too have different needs, purposes, heights and restrictions. They cause us to be in situations we dont need or want to be. Often as a result of actions, we built them and we own them.. but its SO tempting to blame others for that darn fence. Fences are higher in a defence mechanism such as PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) or may be non-existant in the same people. The point is, the diagnosis doesnt define the fence and before you are going to work on it, you need to know root cause analysis of why that fence is there and what needs to be done and a strategy to overcome and fix. But you know what... its your fence. 

Now comes the replacement factors, if a fence is still needed (and it might not). Height, cost, collaboration with neighbours, materials, reusing, discarding, stewardship and more. Always collaborate. A person that does it themselves is a fool with a crooked fence and broken foot and nail through thigh. Talking it out is critical and psychiatry is the talking cure. To confide in another human being the nature... critical in Steps 4 and 5 of Alcoholics Anonymous too. Then can determine what it looks like, gently take down the old one and reconstruct the lines and fences.

Some (I actually propose most) fences need mending and not replacing, but all need maintenance. Having an awareness of you and relationships and what is their root purpose will determine if that fence needs mending. All fences need maintenance and attention. So do relationships and friendships. Want something? Just dont use the other person (unless want a fence built fast). Give and take... reciprocate. Love is also an intelligent concern for other, with a porous two way fence... and really here that means the fences and borders are removed. Pissed someone off? See that fence go up fast baby, 12ft high and full metal jacket all the way. Gotta work with me to fix that one! You caused it and we can fix it if the assessment warrants.

Main takeaway.. look and appraise your fence. Have the mindfulness and willingness and fortitude and guts to do it. Because to know the fences is to then realize what needs to be done with them (removal, fix, fortify) so that you can have insight into your actions and make next steps. And in those enlightened next steps, you can be yourself often.

 

--- Joel Lamoure   July 2011 

 

7:27 am edt 


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